Meeting Two Angels

I recently got back from spending a weekend chaperoning a group of my parish's high school youth to my diocese's annual Diocesan Catholic Youth Conference.

In summary, it was a really awesome experience because some new changes were implemented, and our very own bishop was present the whole weekend. We had Mass all three days of the conference, and two opportunities to adore Christ in the Eucharist. Pretty cool! I certainly feel transformed after going back to the basics and encountering our Lord, Jesus Christ, in the Eucharist, which is the source and summit of our Catholic faith. Conveniently, the theme of the conference was, "Transform ME".

One of the keynote speakers for this year's DCYC was Jackie Francois! She's a pretty popular Catholic speaker and musician from Orange County, CA (shout out!). Her husband, Bobby, was also at DCYC helping sell some of her merchandise.

I've read some of her blogs, I've listened to some of her talks, I follow her on Twitter, and I've listened to some of her songs. She was in the local area several months ago at a monthly Catholic event to play her music, but I was unable to go though I really wanted to. I might have been in Washington, D.C. or Rio De Janeiro or something. As for her husband, I've read some of his blog posts, and I've heard a talk by Jackie on how they met, how they handle their relationship, and cool stuff like that.

I really like her talks because she's a really good speaker, and she isn't afraid to dive deeper on very real topics about real struggles regarding chastity, love, and relationships.

Recently, Bobby wrote a blog post about a really nerdy conversation he had with a priest about comic book superheroes and how Captain America is the most Catholic of the recent ones in the movies. It was really cool to read so I shared it with others since it gave me a deeper appreciation for Captain America. You can read it here: The Catholicity of Captain America

So, with Jackie being here at this conference, I couldn't miss the opportunity to at least meet her and her husband!

At one point during the first night of the conference they were sitting at their table, and I was nearby loitering with some of my fellow chaperones. I didn't want to go talk to them alone so I grabbed a few of my chaperone friends to go talk to them. I introduced myself, and I brought up how I really liked Bobby's blog post, and all of us talked about it. Ultimately, I wanted a picture with them, but our conversation was cut short because Jackie had to be on stage for her keynote. I mean, I wasn't upset, since there was still plenty of time to get that picture. Meanwhile, my teens were bragging about their selfies with them. lol...

The next day, I had the opportunity to eat lunch with them! Since I helped out my youth minister friend and another giving a workshop for this conference, I was entitled to attend the presenters' lunch. When I arrived at the lunch, I noticed Jackie and Bobby were sitting at a mostly empty table so me and my other workshop buds decided to sit at their table. Really odd, but hey! 'Twas an opportunity!

That was really cool because it was just totally casual talking about whatever. Because Jackie is pregnant and due in a few months, the topic of pregnancy and birth came up, which one of my workshop buds was anxiously awaiting the call from his getting-ready-to-give-birth wife. And the dynamics of everyone at the table somehow led to the logistics and technicalities of giving birth unashamedly told as it is. I mean, I can't think of a more appropriate conversation while enjoying hotel cheesecake and coffee... I just couldn't relate, lol. #SingleCatholicGuyProbs

During the lunch, we had the idea of asking Jackie if she would be willing to talk to one of our former teens on the phone. One of our former teens is such a huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge fan of Jackie and aspires to be someone like her. We actually did ask Jackie, and she actually did agree to do so after we were done eating. Meanwhile, we let our former teen know, and she was freaking out and texting in all caps. When mostly everyone left except my buddies and Jackie and Bobby, she asked about making that phone call. So I let Jackie borrow my phone, lol.

It was cool! They had a ten minute conversation, and when Jackie was done talking to her and handed my phone back to me, I tried talking to our former teen. She was just speechless, possibly hyperventilating, possibly even sobbing. Lol, I told her to grab some tissues, and I'd follow up with her when she calmed down.

After that, we went our separate ways. Jackie wanted to take a nap before the evenings' events.

Later that night, I saw Jackie and Bobby at their table again so I finally asked them if I could grab a picture with them.

She says he looks like Leonidas...and by "he", I don't mean me

Pretty awesome!

Now that I've met Jackie, I really want to start listening to more of her music and more of her talks. I also want to properly follow their blog at jackieandbobby.com and keep up with it.

And really, she was just truly a blessing for the conference because having her there really added to the awesome experiences that we had. She's so down to earth and is really relatable in her message to the teens. Through her keynotes throughout the weekend, even I gained better insight about love, dealing with struggles, and allowing Christ to transform our hearts. And interacting with her and her husband was more of the same, but one-on-one.

Bobby's last name is Angel. And that's how I met two Angels.
- JD

PS Pictured are actually three (3) Angels. Hopefully next time I run into them, I'll get to meet Baby Angel! ;-)

Captain America // JackieAndBobby.com

Why I Am Going to Rio De Janeiro

I've been hinting at a trip to Rio since like...a year ago, albeit largely infrequently.  But I never really explained why.

Back in the mid 1980's, Blessed Pope John Paul II invited young Catholics to Rome for a jubilee celebration on Palm Sunday in St. Peter's Square.  Over 300,000 showed up, and he was impressed.  The following year, coinciding with the United Nation's International Year of the Youth, he invited youth to come to Rome again. After that one, Pope John Paul II instituted World Youth Day as like...a normal thing.  Since then, World Youth Days are held every few years internationally.

WYD 2011 in Madrid, Spain. (DICI)

WYD 2008 in Sydney, Australia. (Fr. Chris Ryan, Wordpress)

WYD 2005 in Cologne, Germany. (NBC News)

Back in high school, even though others from my parish made plans and effort to go, I never thought of actually going from a practical standpoint, but I always thought it would be cool. Simply put, time and money were things I didn't really have back then. In college, same thing. But, I was able to vicariously experience World Youth Days in Madrid, Sydney, Cologne, and Toronto through the pictures and stories of friends who went. Maybe someday, I thought.

Two years ago in 2011, I had some friends who ended up going to World Youth Day in Madrid, España. An opportunity came up in my diocese where one of the parishes invited us and a few other parishes to come watch a concert and have a lock-in to watch the closing Mass of World Youth Day Madrid streamed live.  Being the budding and aspiring pro chaperone at the time, I decided to tag along thinking it would be cool to see with my own eyes what a Mass gathering for World Youth Day looks like. Via streaming. ;-)

Can you find my friends? >_> White = altar, dots = people

Since Madrid is several hours ahead of my time, the Mass started at some awkward part in the early morning for us.  And it was a lonnnnnnnng Mass simply because millions were gathered. At an airport tarmac. O_o

Fast forwarding to the end...it came time for Pope Benedict XVI to announce the when and where of the next World Youth Day.  I remember being like...super tired because it was like...4AM or so, and I had been up all night and watching the Mass.  But the anticipation of hearing the announcement for the next World Youth Day was enough to wake me.

So Pope Benedict XVI announced that the next World Youth Day would be in 2013 in Rio De Janeiro, Brazil.  I remember thinking how cool that would be and somewhat wishful thinking as well because I had the desire to go, but I wasn't sure of the means of how I'll go.

I guess I kept that wishful thinking in the back of my mind for about a year because I didn't actively pursue any avenues to make a trip to Rio happen. In the summer of 2012, I learned that a group was being organized by the folks over at The Shepherd's Café. Their ministry leader invited me, actually. Really, this was the only local organized group planning to go that I had heard about at the time, and it was mighty tempting for me to be part of their group. Their trip seemed pretty interesting because it involves a mission trip aspect to other southern American countries before going to Brazil.  I really wanted to go to World Youth Day, and I nearly made an executive decision to go with them. My concern was cost because their trip would be more expensive due to their travels to other countries. But I figured that...I'll pay up because it's a very unique opportunity, and I really wanted to World Youth Day.

I told some people at my parish that I was thinking about going with this group and kind of left it at that as I waited for the next informational.

...And I never ended up going to that informational.

Because, unbeknownst to me, there were some plans being made to send some youth from my parish to World Youth Day in Río! Annnnnddddd! We would be combining with another parish in the diocese!

Since I had expressed my desire to go, I was asked if I would chaperone. No hesitation in saying "yes!" and I made the executive decision to go!

Without spoiling details...this combined trip wouldn't be the same as the other one that I was thinking about joining. Our trip would be more pilgrimage-style experiencing the full week of events at World Youth Day with some free time spent in Río visiting iconic places and churches.

So we had initial meetings last summer to discuss basic info, the documentation required, cost, and all that jazz. That's when I made (and blogged about) an executive decision to join my (combined) parish group.  I'm pretty stoked!

I just recently found out that the hostel that my group is staying at...is sharing the hostel with only one other group: the Shepherd's Cafe group! Totally unintentional on our parts! Haha.

And fun fact! The other parish that I'm combining with is the same parish that we went with to the March For Life in Washington, D.C. back in January! Really, this pilgrimage was a sort of warm up to our trip to Rio!

Now, on a surface level, World Youth Day seems like a time for young Catholics to come together from all over the world to see the pope. As initially cool as that seems, that is not my primary reason to go. Yeah, maybe in high school and college that would have been my reason, but knowing what I know now and where I'm at in my faith, that seems a little too surface-level for me.

I think what draws me to go is to experience the Church in its universal glory united in Jesus Christ. In addition, to learn more about the faith and to have an authentic encounter with Him with (millions gathered of) like-minded young people. Most of the time it is too easy to confine my experience of the Church to the grounds of my own parish and chunk of land that is my diocese. But, truly, at the end of the Gospel of Matthew, after Jesus rose from the dead and revealed His glorified self to His apostles, He commissioned them to "make disciples of all nations...teaching them all [He had] taught them." Was this even remotely accomplished or has progress even been made? I think the answer is a resounding yes. And going to World Youth Day, I'll be able to experience the universal Church through the joyful and cultural expressions of those millions gathered for this event from all. over. the. world. And I think that's really cool!

Psh, the Catholic Church is not merely our buildings or simply an institution. The Church is a living organism, and it will be awesome to see the Body of Christ in a way that I've never seen before in person.  The hundreds of thousands gathered for the March for Life in Washington, D.C. earlier this year pale in comparison to the millions of people who gather for World Youth Day.

But don't get me wrong!!! The secondary motivations of going are still pretty exciting!  I mean, come on!

1. RIO DE JANEIRO! I've never been south of Cancun, Mexico, much less anything Southern American, and to visit Rio would definitely be an awesome experience to see with my own eyes.  Experiencing the culture, seeing the Sugar Loaf Mountains, the Christ the Redeemer Statue, and Copacabana Beach! And other places!
2. COPACABANA BEACH! This is where Pope Francis will welcome us all at the beginning!
3. THOSE GUYS! One of my favorite priests and one of my favorite Franciscan Friars of the Renewal are going with us! Basically, we can have Mass and Confession anytime! And the friar is really good at singing and guitar-playing!
4. MEETING NEW PEOPLE! We're going to interact with a lot of people from all over the world.  A thing to do is to exchange swag, so I'm stocking up on some small Texas things!
5. POPE FRANCIS! Yes, seeing the Pope would be really cool! World Youth Day 2013 is his only scheduled trip outside of Italy this year!
6. TO LEARN! Heaven forbid that Catholics don't learn how to be Catholic! Part of WYD is they provide catechetical sessions so that everyone can learn something more about their faith!
7. TO GROW DEEPER IN MY PRAYER LIFE! Knowing the group I'll be going with, there will be lots of Liturgy of the Hours, Mass everyday if possible, Divine Mercy chaplets, chants in Latin, and other things.  We're also all doing the preparation for the Total Consecration to Mary!  Just in my own preparation, I'm learning more about myself.
8. TO FLY! As an aerospace engineer...I love any opportunities to fly on airplanes!  To make it extra nerdy for me...I'm also curious about the airline seats since airline seating is my job!
9. AND MORE! Many more to list, I'm sure!

I'm grateful for the engineering career that I have for it has enabled me to have the vacation time and monetary means to make this trip possible for me to go on. Seeing how all this has that "everything just worked out" vibe with relative ease...I think that I was definitely not meant to go to the previous World Youth Days.  I'm meant to go to this one, for whatever ultimate reason.

We'll find out.

Vamos para o Rio de Janeiro!
- JD

Christ the Redeemer Statue / LoveThesePics.com
Aerial View of WYD Madrid / PontoEletronicDD @ Flickr

7 Quick Takes (Vol. 8)

--- 1 ---

A test of my Filipino skills! ...when it comes to packing.  I have to somehow pack for 1.5 weeks during my trip to Rio De Janeiro in one carry-on or hiking backpack.

The temptation, as a Filipino, is something like this:

Challenge accepted.  Thank goodness I'm a guy.

#DontForgetYourPAHNTEE

--- 2 ---

One of the beautiful things about being Catholic is the ability to really dive deep into Christian spirituality.  I need to further talk about this in a separate blog post since I'm grossly undertalking about it, but I'll be doing the Total Consecration as prescribed by St. Louis Du Montfort for my trip to Rio.  Along with some friends at my parish, I started this past week!

--- 3 ---

This past week we finally set up a pet gate for my dog to be contained in the kitchen. We actually had a ghetto lattice-fence looking thing from my previous dog but...my current Chihuahua seems to have kangaroo powers and easily climbed/jumped over the old pet gate.  This one seems to work a little better, but ...she's tiny enough to pass through 4" spacings...

--- 4 ---

So there was this one time where I got super bored.  Maybe I had a lot of downtime while traveling across the country.  Maybe I had just started my (older) blog.

Maybe I was being a really nerdy Catholic.

Maybe Katy Perry's "Last Friday Night" was the popular song of the day.

Maybe I put the two together.

And the result was this: "Last Sunday Night".

Maybe some people I know are actually filming a music video with my Catholicized lyrics. o_O

--- 5 ---

I'm running a retreat this weekend.  It's focused on reflecting on the life of Christ...particularly His Baptism, the Wedding at Cana, Proclaiming the Kingdom, the Transfiguration, and the Institution of the Eucharist.  AKA, the Luminous Mysteries of the Rosary.  We're going through these scenes from the Gospels and prayerfully meditating through those passages to come to a deeper understanding of the Word and to see if there's something that God wants us to know through these particular pieces of Scripture.

Cool stuff yo.

--- 6 ---

Visas. Obtained!

-samba dancing-

--- 7 ---
For what it's worth...the mandatory 10-hour overtime per week is still a mental block to get over.  But! As consolation, my Catholic nerdiness is able to grow because that's more Catholic podcasting time!  I usually catch up on Catholic Answers podcasts (see sidebar)...and this priest, Fr. John Riccardo.  I highly recommend 'em if you're interested!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

- JD

The Source

This past weekend I helped out with a retreat for young Catholics. It's called Youth 2000, and it's a Eucharist-centered retreat with the Franciscan Friars and Sisters of the Renewal. I won't provide a detailed recounting of my experience like I usually do when going to various events. Rather, I want to highlight something that stuck out to me.

First, allow me to reiterate that the Catholic faith teaches and upholds that Jesus wasn't being symbolic at The Last Supper. And so, lengthy theological discourses aside (for such a thing deserves its own fair treatment and study), the Eucharist is Jesus' Body under the appearance of bread. He is truly present: body, blood, soul, and divinity in the Eucharist.

So yes, this retreat was a Jesus-centered retreat. Quite literally, as Jesus, in the Eucharist, was placed in the center of the room the whole weekend as we had our retreat.

He's not actually in the middle yet in this picture, but He will be placed on that pyramid-shaped thing (explained below)

There was a point on Saturday when the retreaters were dismissed to go to workshops to dive deeper into discussions following a talk given by one of the friar priests. Since I had unique roles for this retreat, I didn't have to go to a workshop and thus had some time to kill while everyone else was off doin' their thang.

Because of my unique roles, I didn't have time to just focus on Christ because I was always thinking about other stuff or worried about others. Since the gym space used for this retreat was cleared out by most everyone, I decided to seize this opportunity to behold and adore Jesus.  I had been sitting afar because the crowd, now no longer there, had left.  So, I went up closer to a spot that wasn't all up in Jesus' grill with respect to the faithful who were already up front with Him.  I positioned myself so I was decently perpendicular to the Eucharist.  As I was there kneeling with my head bowed down for a while, I decided to look up and stare at Jesus directly.

This is what I was looking at:

Cool shot, huh?  Let me explain.  For the retreat (and unique mostly to this retreat only), we had this structure of candles known as the "Burning Bush" to signify the original of Exodus fame where God talks to Moses.  That gold thingy with rays atop the pyramid structure is a monstrance, a vessel used to show (think Spanish, "mostrar"..."to show") Jesus in the Eucharist, especially when adoring Him.  It makes sense, right?  That in a Eucharist-centered retreat, we're there to listen to what God has to say, much like how Moses was there before the Burning Bush to listen what God had to say to him back then?

Awesome.  Before continuing, I must remind you that I'm Filipino.  Here's the flag:

Yep. The Filipino flag is on the back of my iPhone. In LEGO. (missing a white piece...)

Back to what I was blogging about...

I'll admit, it was cool having that direct view of Jesus in prayerful adoration.  But when I looked up...my attention was definitely on Jesus, but at the same time, something caught my eye.

Particularly, this:

Apparently it was 2:37

Notice how Jesus in the monstrance replaces the sun on the Philippine flag.  Ok, I confess that I got up to get my camera and returned to my spot to capture a more perfect perspective, but truly I say to you that when I looked up at Jesus for a little bit, I noticed how the monstrance was directly in front of the Philippine flag.  And I was at a good enough of an angle to see how the monstrance covers  up the rays of the sun on the flag.

I reflected on this because it just seemed so...purposeful. I wasn't really actively praying...but rather...staring and listening. Adoring.  And that's probably how I noticed my perspective revealed this monstrance to seem as if it is the sun of the flag.

Reflecting on this, I realized that being Filipino is definitely a part of who I am. Born and raised. I've embraced my culture and greatly appreciate it, and I am not afraid to share and promote Filipino culture, especially since that was a good chunk of my college experience.  I mean, it's not like I choreographed, taught, and performed Filipino cultural dances at Texas A&M or anything...

And here Jesus is radiating like the sun at the center of the Philippine flag!  Now, I know Catholicism is very central to western Filipino culture.  Catholicism is central to Filipino identity (at least in my experience).  Looking at this and reflecting on it more...if being Filipino is central to my identity as JD...is Jesus the center of my identity?

Again, is Jesus the very center of who I am?

Then it dawned on me... (#pun #dawn #sun #Son)

As a Christian, Jesus needs to be the center of my identity.  So as long as I call myself Catholic and Christian...Jesus must be at the center of my identity.  My life. And from there, Jesus should radiate through the other things I identify with.  For me, that is being Filipino. Being an Aggie. Being a band nerd. Being an engineer. Being a quasi-professional volunteer in extra-curriculars. Being (insert here). Being who I am in whatever I do.

And the crazy thing is...I didn't kneel before Jesus during this time trying to seek this realization.  It just...came to me in such a real, tangible way by apparent coincidence.

You see my current tagline for my blog? St. Catherine of Siena once said:

If you are who God calls you to be, then you will set the world ablaze.

...and that ties in so wonderfully with seeing Jesus radiate through the Philippine flag.  He didn't have to speak to me in any way.  He just had to show me.

Is Jesus the very center of who I am? That shall be my litany of prayerful reflection in response to that question this week.

This guy is on fire.
- JD

---

This post is linked on Catholic Bloggers Link-Up Blitz

Beautiful

So for years and years now, my church has helped out with Beautiful Feet Ministries, a homeless outreach organization that provides for spiritual and material needs as well as basic medical attention for homeless individuals on the outskirts of downtown Ft. Worth.  Every year on Christmas Eve morning, my church helps out by sorting clothes donations, praying for and with the homeless, and serving them lunch.  And in the particular ministries I'm in at my church, a few weeks ago we put together new socks stuffed with toiletries to hand out to them whenever they finish their lunch.  Also, our Knights of Columbus council cooks up a delicious Thanksgiving-esque lunch for the homeless (like...turkey, mashed potatoes, green beans, roll, etc). Pretty cool stuff.

This was my third year in a row participating in helping out with Beautiful Feet.  I had the privilege of laying out an improved game plan on the sorting process.  Because man, when you have 100+ people trying to sort a bunch of clothes, it can get really hectic and chaotic when you don't have some sort of system or game plan in place.  Yes, my engineering mind definitely kicked in when trying to improve this process.  I can honestly say that we accomplished our sorting, bagging, and storing tasks relatively efficiently (better than the last two years, haha) and had a bit of down time before we had a mini-service before serving lunch.

Actually, Beautiful Feet normally holds a service for the homeless prior to lunch time, but we had the unique opportunity in leading that service instead of Beautiful Feet personnel leading it.  And that was a really beautiful thing to be part of.

To start off the service, some of our youth led the singing of Christmas carols to just get everyone in the mood and in the Christmas spirit.  Our youth minister led an opening prayer and reflection.  The Beautiful Feet coordinator working with us asked us to find some people willing to give Christmas testimonies.  Our first testimony during the service was actually one of the homeless gentlemen.  He wanted to share a poem that he wrote about the first Christmas day.  The poem was just...beautiful!  It was beautiful because you could tell that he understood the meaning of Christmas and eloquently poem'd about it.  Better than I could.  And it turns out he loves writing poems because he shared some of his other works (like, published in a booklet he was carrying with him) with others.  Pretty neat!

We also had two other members of our group give a personal witness on what Christmas means to them.  I particularly like how one of them said that the days leading up to Christmas is a time of preparation, whether for family and friends to come over.  But ultimately, it is all preparation for the coming of Jesus Christ.  I hadn't thought about how we spend all this time decorating for Christmas, making sure our house is clean for guests, and other holiday preparations...but...for what?  Why even prepare?  And the answer is...because we celebrate the coming of Christ!  Awesome :-)  The other witness talk was about how she always travels around Christmas time and thus things are always hectic and crazy, kind of like when Mary and Joseph were traveling to Bethlehem and how crazy it must have been for them to not find a place to stay.  I like how she made that connection.

And then finally, our youth minister wrapped up with a reflection from the beginning of Luke 2 where we find the Nativity narrative.  The main message is that even in the chaos and craziness of our lives, no matter what we're going through, we should keep Christ as our center like Mary and Joseph does away in a manger and beyond.  That to begin keeping Christ as our center and letting Him in our lives, we must say "yes" to Him like Mary does when the angel Gabriel speaks to her in Luke 1.  Her yes, "May it be done to me according to your word" (Luke 1: 38 NAB), lets Christ in...not just for Mary, but for the world!  Think about that and the immense "yes" her yes was.

Cool reflections and testimonies.

But, as cool as sorting out donated clothes and participating in a service are, I think my favorite part of doing it this year was right after the service and before lunch.  The main coordinator designated me as the one to hand out meal tickets so that the homeless can get their lunch.  So yes, I actually got to briefly interact with every homeless individual that was there.  Maybe my customer service skills kicked in, so I had a joyful smile in greeting them and handing them tickets.  But I found that my smile only grew bigger because...they were the ones to first give me a smile and say "Merry Christmas!" to me, and I could definitely see it in their eyes a sense of gratitude because they were going to receive a really delicious meal.  Kind of humbling really, because I wasn't the only one helping out with the day's effort yet here I am sharing a brief moment with every. single. one. of. them.  And that was really beautiful to see how gracious and thankful they all were.  I actually didn't get to help serve lunch this time because I was busy handing out tickets.

You know, I live a comfortable, middle-class, first world life.  And that's fine.  But truly, I can't bring myself to live my life without at least remembering those who don't have a roof over their head with no family to take care of them.  And in my current journey of faith, a stagnant faith gets nothing done--my response as a disciple of Jesus Christ is to put my faith into action--I'm...en fuego, if you will.  Thus, simply remembering the homeless isn't enough...what can I do to help?  How may I serve?  And that's what's great about Beautiful Feet.  It gives me an opportunity during an opportune time of year to serve the homeless.  But! I don't just serve them once year...  About once a month for the past year and a half, I've also helped with making peanut butter sandwiches that gets sent to another homeless ministry in Ft. Worth.  And yeah, since I've started helping out with Beautiful Feet, the thought of "hmm, what clothes in my closet can I donate?" is always in the back of my mind.  Psh, I don't need a tax deduction from donating my clothes to like...Goodwill.  ;-)  Actually, I totally just donated like 5 pairs of pants that no longer fit me this past time so... I hope one of the homeless men get to enjoy them since I can't anymore.

Anyway, I think that the temptation in thinking about the homeless is that they're a bunch of low-lifes who can't get their act together.  And you know what, I don't really know their story until I actually get to talk to them personally.  But regardless of how they wound up in their situation, regardless of the steps they're taking to get out of their current situation, regardless of homeless stereotypes...the least I can do is provide for their material needs and provide food for them...the least I can do is acknowledge them as human beings and give them dignity...personally.  I'm not gonna lie, I get in better touch with my humanity whenever I serve those who are less fortunate (like babies, kids, and elderly in a previous blog post).

So, I ask you, dear reader of my blog, to keep the homeless in your thoughts and prayers, especially this holiday season.  The local weather is going to be harshly cold and most likely wet if it isn't already.  Let us be  grateful for what has been given to us...and remember those who aren't as fortunate.  Hopefully, something stirs within us such that we're called into action and that we answer that call.  Living a Christ-centered life and called to do God's will, we must say "yes" like Mary.  Whatever we do for the least among us, we do for Christ (Matthew 25:31-46).

Merry Christmas and happy holidays!
- JD

A Taste

Last week I paid off $700 towards my trip to Brazil next year for World Youth Day 2013.  Not gonna lie, I got pretty excited because that payment makes me somewhere halfway to paying off for the trip.  Pretty exciting!!!

And yesterday, I had a little taste of World Youth Day.  My diocese and the other major neighboring diocese hold their own smaller scale World Youth Day once a year at Six Flags Over Texas.  No big deal.  What a great way to test your faith and sense of mortality whenever you ride of some those roller coasters! Lol...

I had a lot of fun riding Mr. Freeze, Batman, the Shockwave, and Runaway Mountain.  Lines were long...all these Catholics were in line for some reason... Haha.

Six Flags Over Texas is a fairly large park, and it seemed like every other person was wearing some sort of t-shirt representing their parish.  I never fully grasped just how many people were there for World Youth Day until the closing Mass with the bishops.  I estimate something over 2000+ people were there for this event--kinda crazy.  Yet we fit inside of Six Flags' amphitheater.  A Mass gathering, if you will.

When I went to this event last year, that was my first time ever serving as a Extraordinary Minister of Holy Communion during the closing Mass.  I was called upon to serve as an EMHC again for this year, and the opportunity is always so humbling because ...well...I'm not worthy that Jesus should enter under my roof, yet me, a lowly servant, must literally present Him to the faithful to share that intimate communion with Him.  Annnnd, not only that, I was part of an army of EMHC's because...there was this huge Mass gathering of Catholics.  Cool stuff.

Lastly, this was a significant event.  This is probably one of the last few (or THE last?) major youth event that we get to see Bishop Vann since he's going SOCAL on us.  A cherished moment in having him celebrate the Mass for us, for sure.  And I laugh because his homily was about Twitter, and he did his usual Confirmation routine of asking questions about if we could tweet today's message, what would those tweets be?

Anyway, again...Six Flags was but a mere taste of the big World Youth Day knowing that Rio's World Youth Day will be on a much grander scale.  And my excitement only grows from here!

Walk by faith.
- JD

Bishop's 8th Annual Pro-Life Banquet

This evening I had the awesome opportunity to attend the Bishop's 8th Annual Pro-Life Banquet.  The funny thing is... I originally wanted to go until I found out that the date conflicted with another Catholic event I frequent (The Shepherd's Cafe)....on top of that, today is also the first marching competition for my high school band, of which I'm currently an active volunteer for when I'm not volunteering at my parish.  I was conflicted up until a week ago on which of the three events I would attend...like, I wish I could tri-locate.

(insert Padre Pio meme)

But, I guess God really wanted me to be at the banquet because one of the adults from our Respect Life committee approached me randomly last week offering me a seat at his table for the banquet.  Apparently, one of our resident Hispanic sisters at our parish wouldn't be able to attend, so I was invited to take her place.  And I did.  And I'm grateful for the opportunity!

I've never been to the Bishop's Pro-Life Banquet before so this was all new to me.

My first observation upon arriving was...that it felt weird coming to the Hyatt Regency at D/FW Airport for a Catholic event that wasn't DCYC.  The only other times I've been to this venue was for DCYC.  I mean, the same large room was used, but set up for dinner.  Same base level used.  But instead of a bunch of Catholic youth running around to different booths in the lobby of the base level, there were a bunch of adults dressed nicely carrying adult beverages (definitely not a youth event, haha).  

My second observation was that yes, there were youth running about--youth from my parish!  Since a good handful of them are part of our diocese's Youth For Life organization, they were enlisted to help out in various capacities for tonight's banquet.  Small Catholic world.  Wasn't expecting to see them.

I got to mingle around with other adults from my parish.  Yes, with red wine (praise God I'm Catholic!).  After some mingling and brief looking around at the silent auction, I sat down at my table.  The crazy part about my table is that...it included my pastor and his wife (he's an Episcopalian convert), Bishop Vann was at a table next ours, and right behind me was the stage.  Cool!

To get the night started, John Rhadigan of local sportscasting fame, provided his master of ceremony services.  Yes, he sas giving some Rangers updates throughout the night.  He apparently is a TV anchor for FSN and has done some other sports host-related jobs.  Cool stuff.

During dinner, they had musical entertainment involving a piano player and later a mariachi band!  I approve, being the band nerd that I am.

It was kind of funny because Bishop Vann finished his dinner rather quickly only to get up and be a social butterfly in talking to the many people in attendance during dinner.

John Rhadigan came up again after dinner to introduce Fr. Jim Pemberton of St. Bartholomew's in south Ft. Worth.  He provided some humor with stories and then started going on about how we must be the light in the darkness in regards to the culture of death that we currently live in.  For added effect, when he talked about darkness, they actually dimmed the lights.  He brought up Bishop Vann to speak and he reiterated being a light in the darkness, and Bishop talked about his reassignment to Orange County, CA.

After Fr. Jim Pemberton, John Rhadigan came up again to start a live auction.  They auctioned off a cool painting similar to this:

...this is from the Sistine Chapel where God (right) is reaching out to Adam (left).  But the picture auctioned off has a baby fetus on the left, with God reaching out with His finger.  Cool.  

There was a local Catholic painter who donated this beautiful crucifix that he painted in a particular Byzantine style to be auctioned off.  And he also painted a huuuuuuuge painting of the Annunciation not based on any particular style but his own.  Beautiful pieces of art, but I didn't take pictures because...I was front row and that would have been awkward.

Next up was a video presentation from the Youth for Life.  I think all but one of the youth giving interviews were from my parish.  A lot of them talked about their Pro-Life Boot Camp from the past summer and the importance of being pro-life.  That was really cool to see.  I love seeing my parish represented through the witness of our youth taking action in the greater Church.

After them, John Rhadigan had our keynote speaker come up.  Dr. Thomas Hilgers is a ob/gyn who discovered, researched, developed, and promoted NaPro Techonology, which is a method in addressing women's reproductive health by getting to the root of the problem rather than putting a band aid on women's health issues through prescribing the birth control pill and other such negative solutions.  He's also the founder of the Pope Paul VI Institute where they research reproductive health solutions and teach medical professionals how to be Catholic doctors as well as educate women on how to utilize their fertility services.

Dr. Hilgers explained his story of how he got into being a doctor specializing in women's reproductive health from a Catholic perspective.  I think the essence of his talk was that to be pro-life, we have to remember that fertility treatments like in-vitro fertilization results in the death of many embryos before a successful pregnancy occurs.  And that the solution to many women's reproductive and fertility issues can be solved via the methods that he has researched and practices (particularly NaPro and Creighton model).  He covered a lot, including statistical information.  In addition, he touched on faith and science because those two things seemingly contradict each other, but to be Catholic is to be a lover of faith and reason/science.  One thing I found surprising is that he mentioned that the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists is pro-contraception, pro-abortion, etc.  You would think that people in that profession would be more open to other ideas besides those that harm a woman's health...but...that's just the crazy world we live in.

Following Dr. Hilgers, Bishop Vann came up to wrap it all up. 

He awarded a couple from our parish due to their dedication to the pro-life cause in our diocese.  Very cool.

Raffle tickets pulled by seminarians.  Closing prayer by a priest.  More mingling afterwards.  Then, I went home.

All in all, a good night.  I'm grateful that I went.  Bonus points because I got some free Catholic swag (a book on St. Therese by Archbishop Fulton Sheen, and some other literature) and the opportunity to see my parish family at this event.

Tonight just reaffirms my commitment to my own pro-life efforts, especially since we're in the middle of a 40 Days for Life campaign.  Also, this deserves a future blog post but also a lot of research to in order to give it the justice it deserves...but...I think the other takeaway tonight is the Catholic response to the attacks on faith and reason and women's health.  Because...there are people out there who say Science >>> Faith and that the Catholic Church hates women and the Church is but an obstacle to women's health.  But with the work that Dr. Hilger's does...it just blows those arguments outa the water.  Like, boom roasted.

With that, I end with a quote from a prayer booklet that I use when praying at the abortion clinic while meditating on the Glorious Mysteries:

"To be pro-life is to be pro-woman.  To be pro-woman demands we be pro-life."

- JD

PS Upon looking at my program from tonight...it looks like Tim Tebow's mom is the keynote speaker for next year.  #NoBigDeal

CFW!

Tonight begins a week-long service/missionary/retreat experience called Camp Fort Worth.

I've been pretty excited about going since hearing about it last year.  It seemed that every high school youth at my parish that went to CFW at any point in the past thinks it's pretty amazi-tacular-ful.  Like, life-changing for some of them.  Whoa.  I want to know why.  And I hear you get to serve people, which is something that I like doing.

But I wasn't able to go last year since I have #youngadultproblems and haven't earned vacation time at my place of employment just yet.

This year, however...


Let's do this!  More blog posts to come, I'm sure.
- JD

DCYC 2012

Whew.  What a weekend!  I had the opportunity to chaperone our high school and middle school youth to our Diocesan Catholic Youth Conference.

DCYC offers several keynote speakers and a variety of workshops for youth and their leaders to grow deeper in ways to live an active Catholic life--all centered around the theme, which for this year is "Ignite my heart, I burn for you."  
I think this is a great theme because I have a thing for spiritual fire.  Hence, this blog's name, En Fuego.  I like how the keynote speakers and Bishop Vann brought the idea that if you're spiritually on fire, you have to do something about it.  The Holy Spirit burns brightly within us all and ...what, then, is our response?  And DCYC this year got us thinking more about what our response could be.  Just don't stand near candles lest your garments be on fire literally, as advised by Bishop Vann haha!
But, I don't want to focus so much on what was said by the keynote speakers.  Besides, I cannot hope to recreate in typing of words their energy and fire for I can't do it any justice.  Rather, I want to focus on my observations of seeing the Catholic youth...particularly the youth from my own parish...and other cool things that have all to do with the meat of the weekend's experience.  While DCYC isn't really meant to really dig deeper in Catholic spirituality, the various events offer ways to just...get excited about being Catholic which hopefully leads to a desire to grow deeper in the faith.
This is my second time going to DCYC, and after this year I definitely see its value of how it can bring a group together closer by building community and sharing in the Catholic faith doing Catholic things.  This is especially true of our youth at SEAS.  
Friday Night I arrived late since I came straight from work, but I picked up pizzas.  Then delivered the pizzas.  Many from our youth group came to the table of plenty of Cici's pizzas.  There was bonding in each group over cheese and pepperoni.  And sausage.
We went through night prayer and the first keynote speaker.  Had a mini dance party with DJ Bill Lage of Catholic Dance fame.  
Gathered up again after Friday's events.  There was a reading from Jeremiah 1 for night prayer service that we felt like deserved digging deeper into and really chewing on the message of that Scripture passage.  So when we gathered back before bedtime, our youth minister led us through a sort of Lectio Divina, reflecting on the words from Jeremiah 1.  God knew us before we were formed in the womb, and even before He formed us, He called us.  We are set aside as prophets to proclaim the Good News.  
I don't know when...but at some point on Friday night we apparently adopted Sr. Giovanna Mariae and Sr. Grace Dominic of the Sisters of Life.  Just to take care of them and hang out with them and invite them to things that we're doing for the rest of the weekend.  They were grateful for our invitations and hospitality.
Lastly, bed time.
Saturday This day was workshop day.  Everyone could go to various workshops on their own, so it's impossible for me to recount the experiences that anyone experienced through these workshops.  After all, I'm only one person and cannot multi-locate and can't be everywhere at once! (#piojokes).  However, there is one workshop I can speak for--the one that I helped lead. ;-)
Gabe and I led the "Man Up! Exploring the Role of Men in Relationships and in Society" workshop.  The workshop went really well! We asked the guys that attended (who were of different parishes) to partner up and talk about the manliest movies they've seen, and the manliest characters they know of.  Then we discussed what makes these manly characters...manly.  After that, we had a slideshow displaying various manly images.  The cool thing is...the slideshow goes from images that focus on steaks and strength, then crescendos to fatherhood and ultimately to Jesus Christ on the cross.  I then talked about interior strength and its importance.  Gabe focused on who men are for women.  And I think the most fruitful thing we did in our workshop was splitting up the crowd of guys 8 ways and provided each group with a different situation that tested how they can man up in that situation.  Example:  You're alone with your girlfriend in her house and the temptation and opportunity are there to go further--how do you man up?  After sharing everyone's answers, we provided them with the link to E5men.org, which is an online group of men dedicated to loving the women of their lives (especially their wives) as Christ loved His Church (as in, Ephesians 5).  Boom roasted.  Annnnd the cool part was...we got a lot of positive feedback from the adults and young men who attended that workshop, many handshakes from guys, and one or two guys even stayed longer to ask questions on how to deal with a situation.  Beautiful.  I loved seeing how fired up the guys were towards the end!  Ignited their masculine hearts, perhaps? :-)
Insert more workshops and keynote speaking here.
A tradition that we have is eating dinner with St. Ann's of Burleson on Saturday evening of DCYC.  In DCYC prep meetings, we had a group of guys plan some ice breakers to play with St. Ann's youth.  And that's exactly what we did!  After a while, we even got some of our chaperones and Srs. Giovanna and Grace to play with us!  After playing several games, we feasted on Spring Creek barbecue and Chicken Express.  And there was much mingling.  Oh, and the band Jesus Team A was having their sound check like...the whole time while we were playing games and eating dinner.  
St. Ann's leaves...and we tried gathering our SEAS youth into the corner of the room to have a mini-meeting and announcements.  We gather into the corner...and zomg.  For whatever reason, everyone started busting out singing "Lean On Me" !  Jesus Team A decided to start providing music to the youth singing.  Then ...the whole ordeal evolved into a dance party for a good solid 15 minutes with Jesus Team A doing "Lean On Me" and "Hold Us Together" and other songs.  A dance party!  It just...happened.  Like, no one said "hey let's have a dance party!"  Totally organic in how it happened.  Freakin' awesome!  
We finally had our announcements.  The rest of the evening was a sort of free-for-all of what you wanted to do because various activities were available like board games, movies, dancing, talent show, praying, etc.
Here's what I did and saw: I went over to the Prayer Room because I wanted to join in on praying the Divine Mercy Chaplet let by another parish ... in front of Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament.  Unfortunately, I caught the last decade...but that's okay!  I still stuck around for a good long while in Adoration.  Since I could see the door to the room out of the corner of my eye while facing Jesus...I could see who walked into the room.  The cool thing is, whenever I walked in, there was already a good group of our SEAS youth.  And when we finished the DMC, there was a constant trickling in of different SEAS people, youth and adults.  Groups of our youth, too!  Especially the younger ones and the ones that I don't know very well.  SEAS made sure not to make Jesus feel lonely, and I just think it's awesome that we were well-represented in keeping Jesus company.  I left after a while then hit up the talent show/coffee house.
I really needed coffee at this point and I knew that the talent show had some while they were also having a talent show.  This is where I spent most of my time because some of our youth participated in the talent show.  Let me just say, after seeing our youth perform...I'm impressed!  One of our guys is pursuing a career as a professional rappper and he performed a rap that he had just written the night before.  And oh my gosh, it was so good.  I could really feel the passion in his rap about how things are going bad, but there's redemption in it all.  One of my fellow young adult chaperones shed some tears because it was that good.  Awesome.  Another one of our guys likes to sing.  A lot.  He performed "I'm Yours" by Jason Mraz and he has a really good voice!  I was impressed.  Another group of our guys performed with some of their Camp Fort Worth friends a cover of Paul Kim's "From Shore to Shore."  That's when I found out that one of our guys can do spoken word rap really, really well.  Like, whoa.  I, too, was impressed by that.  These same guys, minus their CFW friends, also did their own performance of the "Catholic Pick-Up Line Song" by David Casper (a fellow Aggie Catholic).  That was awesomely hilarious.  And ironic, too, if you know those guys.  I'm inclined to tell a Catholic girl that I'd be her second class relic if she just gives me a kiss on the cheek.  Haha anyway...
Also, there was a Franciscan Friar sighting at the talent show.  Fr. Pio, in fact.  He was swarmed. 
We concluded the conference night with another big dance party with DJ Bill.  I realized I need to work on my Bernie dance, but it's hard to do without punching someone accidentally.  
Like the night before, we gathered as a group again.  This time we prayed the Divine Mercy Chaplet in our usual sung version.  Oh my gosh!  I think the combination of most everyone knowing how to sing the Chaplet, the acoustics of the room, and just the movement of the Holy Spirit made for a really, really, really beautiful praying of the Chaplet. We sung the Salve Regina after the DMC and that was really beautiful too!  Like, truly, a blessing to have a solid group of youth who can sing well and so beautifully.
Then bed time.  Kind of. Stayed up late doing chaperone things.  To our youth that is reading this blog post...I don't apologize for listening to your door to make sure you're asleep and not making noise.  But believe me, I was sneaking around like a Catholic ninja in the hallway.  :-D
Sunday (Today) By today, I could tell that most everyone in our youth group has bonded such that...you can tell that everyone is comfortable and friendly with each other.  
I think the one really cool thing our youth did today was...worship disobedience.  You know, tis hard to find a venue to hold ~1500 people, and thankfully the hotel's ballroom has enough space for chairs.  An announcement was made prior to Mass that because the space is tight (which it wasn't), it's okay to stand during the Eucharistic Prayer (in other words, stay standing after singing the Holy, Holy, Holy).  Believe it or not...I didn't have to look around and give looks of "umm...that's going to be awkward" because there was already a group of youth around me saying that they're going to kneel anyway.  And within a minute, the memo of "we're still going to kneel" spread throughout our group.  So, when it came time...like...90% of us kneeled.  And I'm pretty sure our group was the only group kneeling in that part of that room that I could see.  Awesome.  I think that just speaks loudly of how our youth approaches Liturgy and the Mass...that we know what's going on during the Eucharistic Prayer and that we have a genuine desire to revere Christ in humility.  We kneeled not because we know it's a rule or ordinary practice, but because we wanted to...  Besides, there was room to kneel.  But...bottom line...that was really wonderful to see...because we know.  We know Who becomes truly present during the Consecration.  And that's the time to be reverent and focused.  :-)
(Disclaimer:  While I haven't looked up whether you HAVE TO kneel during the Eucharist Prayer in the General Instruction of the Roman Missal, I would imagine that the GIRM allows for flexibility depending on circumstances...But, the whole point is...SEAS is just doing what we do normally, even if told otherwise).
Anyway, after Mass and during dismissal/parent pickup...a lot of us said goodbye to the Sisters of Life...a good group of us befriended them and made them feel welcome to our group.
All in all, this was a really great weekend for our youth to bond together.  Actually, not just the youth.  I feel like I've bonded with the other chaperones too.  We have some new faces and I feel like that serving the youth helped us bond together too.  :-)  I'm seeing posts on Facebook and Twitter about how positive an experience it was from some of our youth already! 
So yes, our hearts were ignited through sharing in the Catholic faith this weekend.  Hopefully we keep the fire burning as we continue to do our SEAS things for the rest of the summer...and now I'm getting more pumped for the start of another year as a volunteer!  After all, being on fire...you have to do something about that. ;-)
Oftentimes, I feel truly blessed to be part of SEAS Youth Ministry because...I don't know...the way we bond together and our appreciation for orthodoxy ...and just how brightly our hearts burn...it's just really really awesome to see that. Inspiring.  And this weekend was just another affirmation of that.
Ignite my heart.
- JD

So you just got Confirmed...

Dear newly Confirmed member of the Catholic Church,

First of all, I want to welcome you to the club!  I mean, you were already part of it...but now your initiation process is complete!  So welcome!!!  Hopefully Bishop didn't put too much chrism in your eye, if he used too much or missed your forehead for some reason!

I just wanted to let you know, on behalf of your parish family (and the diocese, and really...the greater Church as a whole), that we're so proud of you.  If only you knew the extent of our prayers for you to receive this sacrament.  Believe me, whether it is made known to you or not--a lot of prayers have been offered for you.  Across the parish, across the nation...even others from around the world!

I hope that your suffering through Confirmation classes has at least equipped you with the basic knowledge to know what it is you are partaking in.  But my dear sibling in Christ, there is so much more to learn!

Being Catholic does NOT end at Confirmation!

Confirmation is NOT graduation.

It's like...learning a martial arts discipline and earning your black belt.  Baptism is earning your white belt.  You progress through the other belts through religious education and Confirmation classes.  Then finally--you earn it! Your black belt.  Confirmation.  But in martial arts, they always say..."black belt is simply the beginning."

With all this training and basic knowledge, now is the time to start applying what you know.  And to go even deeper.  And yes, to teach others too by your life and example.  Confirmation is simply a renewed beginning of the rest of your Catholic life.

My dear sibling in Christ, do not let your Catholic faith fade!  Whether you feel it or not, the Holy Spirit now burns brightly within your soul.  And last I checked, if you're on fire (literally), you have to do something about it.  You can either A) make the fire bigger, B) let it burn itself out, or C) extinguish it.  And it's obvious for me to say that Option A is the way to go...because the fiery soul is truly a gift.  A great power.  Thus, a great responsibility.  It's your responsibility to keep that fire burning.  Dump some diesel on it.  Nuke it.  Maybe have movie director Michael Bay provide his explosive expertise.

God's call for you is now ever present.  What is your response?

I hope and pray that you take the strength of the Holy Spirit now burning within you to put your Catholic faith into action.  Passivity only allows the fire to burn itself out.

Dearest sibling in Christ, the Catholic Church needs those who are on fire with the Holy Spirit.  The world seems to be an increasingly hostile environment for the Catholic Church, especially in the American Catholic Church.  We need young, enthusiastic Catholics who genuinely seek what it really means to be Catholic and to inspire the minds and ignite the hearts of others to be disciples of Jesus Christ.  To be living examples striving to answer their call to holiness through actions of love and charity.

Let me quote an offshoot of a song lyric which somewhat quotes a good friend quoting his favorite retreat speaker quoting his favorite theologian quoting a pretty legit saint:

"If you are who God calls you to be, you will set the world ablaze" - St. Catherine of Sienna

Yes.  St. Ignatius of Loyola also used to say to his students, "Go set the world on fire."

It's okay to be simultaneously a pyro and fisherman for God.  Use responsibly.

So do something with your faith.  Seek truth.  Don't settle for mediocrity and partial truths.  Go help other people.  Develop yourself in the interior.  Be a living witness and saint.

And you've received gifts.  Share them with the world!

Know your faith.  Own your faith. Live your faith.  Spread your faith.

Sealed with the gift of the Holy Spirit.
- JD

Executive Decision

Last summer, I went on a small road trip with our youth group to another parish an hour away.  We joined up with another youth group to watch a live feed of the closing Mass at World Youth Day 2012 in Madrid, Spain.

And after staying up all night (literally) watching the Closing Mass, I couldn't help but think, "Man! I really want to go to a World Youth Day!"  And I decided that I would start saving money, knowing that such a trip will cost like at least 3500 small coffees from McDonald's.  Not that I get small coffees at McDonald's that often. Anymore. Ahem...

Anyway, I remember back in high school, our youth group went to like...each one.  But I never had the time or could afford it.  So I missed out on the opportunities to go to WYD in Toronto, Germany, and Australia.

But now that I'm full-time employed with some earned vacation time, I've made an executive decision to go to World Youth Day 2013 in Rio De Janeiro, Brazil.

Earlier this week, I attended a meeting to start getting more information about a combined trip between my parish and another parish.  Sounds pretty exciting!  Can't wait!

I hope that a lot of youth get to go too to share this experience!

It's gonna happen.  God-willing. JD-hoping/praying.

(Insert something Portuguese here)
-JD

Know kneelers, know comfort. No kneelers, no comfort.

Last summer, I was sitting there at Mass  in the amphitheater of Six Flags Over Texas and Bishops Farrell of Dallas and Vann of Ft. Worth were on stage.  We sang through the new translation of the Holy, Holy, Holy as practice for the upcoming Advent season.

After we finished singing, I kneeled down.  On concrete.  I saw the rest of our youth group kneel down as well, because...that's just what you do during the Eucharistic Prayer, Consecration, etc.  I looked around puzzled because some of the other groups didn't kneel at first.  Was the concrete that much of a discouragement to not kneel during this part of the Mass?  But after my youth group all finished kneeling, I noticed the groups around us slowly start to kneel.  And that was cool because we sort of led the way. 

While the Bishops were doing their thing in persona Christi at the altar, I couldn't help but notice my discomfort kneeling on the concrete.  And I was wearing shorts.  As I was trying to focus, I also found myself encouraging myself to endure concrete kneeling. 

Haha, I think after that Mass...I thought "man, I'm glad I don't have to do that often."  

I go back to daily life.  And last summer, daily life included more Daily Masses than usual.  One of the joys of being a volunteer for the youth group is seeing the high schoolers attend Daily Mass regularly.  I've noticed this before, but after Six Flags, I started noticing moreso that some of the high schoolers don't use kneelers.  Eeeenteresting.

Seeing their example, I started not using kneelers in the pews at Daily Mass and Sunday Mass whenever I've got a kneeler to myself.  At first I was like, "hmm, I'll do what they do...coz it's more hardcore! And I don't want to be outdone by them especially if I'm to be their teacher!"

Well, not using a kneeler eventually became a habit of mine.  

And sometime recently, I realized a deeper meaning of not using a kneeler in the pew.  

You see, because of the discomfort of not using a padded kneeler while kneeling at Mass, I realized a profound thing regarding the Catholic faith: 

I shouldn't be comfortable in my Catholic faith.

Well that seems kind of ... negative, depending on how you look at it.  But no! I see it as a good thing.  The temporary discomforts causes me to seek comfort and peace.  Being uncomfortable in the Catholic faith ultimately causes me to seek the comfort and peace in Jesus, because that is who the Church points to.

And the other part is... I shouldn't be comfortable in my Catholic faith because I feel like if I were to be comfortable, I wouldn't feel compelled to dive deeper.  The quest for 2000 years of Catholic truth makes for a very, very deep ocean at which to dive deeper into.

...and not using kneelers is my one, physical way to remind myself to not stay comfortable.  It's temporary anyway.  And hardcore if you can kneel for a bajillion hours at Youth 2000 retreats.

I mean, I look at the crucifix and see that Jesus had to go through discomfort in order to be resurrected. #understatement  

If He can do that, I can endure kneeling on bare carpet, floors, concrete, gym floors, and whatever-I-happen-to-be-kneeling on for a little while.

Lastly, the other thing I get out of not using kneelers is that...before the Blessed Sacrament, it places me at a lower level.  I really get a sense of humility before the Lord by being lower, physically.  In essence, by placing myself lower, I raise Him higher.  Cool to think about.

Don't get me wrong--I'm not here to say that "everyone should never use kneelers"... Because that would be ridiculous and unrealistic.  But ... my life is Catholic.  Anything I can do that reminds me of my call to holiness (without being heretical or going against prescribed rubrics) is...a good thing.

*Updated:
And oh, if I'm sitting in a pew and have to share kneelers with others, I'll use the kneeler and not force my pew mates to kneel on the floor.  That would be a total jerk move, especially next to grandma.

Know kneelers, know comfort. No kneelers, no comfort.

- JD

Popes kneeling from Flickr: Papist

Of Mothers, Sickness, and Conversion

In our Catholic walk through life, I'm sure we all experience those moments of conversion that make you go "wow, Catholicism is awesome...Catholicism works!..."  I have had a few major conversion moments throughout my life thus far, and this is one of them.

Note:  To keep things private, I have changed some names.

Background
When I was an assistant black belt instructor at my Tae Kwon Do dojo in early high school, I met a fellow Filipino family.  I taught Shawn, and my family befriended his parents (since my grandfather and parents took me to class since I didn't drive yet).  Shawn's parents are really nice, and I remember my parents and grandfather talking to them non-stop for the full hour of class...like...every time.

My parents enrolled me in high school religious education classes my freshman year of high school.  Needless to say, it was required so that I could get Confirmed.  I barely remember my class from freshman year, but I do recall my fellow classmates from my Confirmation/religious education class.  That's where I met J.T. or at least...got to know him better, since I'm not sure if I met him my freshman year.  I would say my Filipino radar is pretty good, and I could tell that he, too, is Filipino.  While the Filipino connection was an obvious start to a friendship, I didn't find out til later that J.T. is actually the older brother of Shawn.  I think it was one of those awkward parent pick-up moments after class where I found this out.  It kind of blew my mind, actually, because it IS a small world after all.

Awesome.  So now I know this family through Tae Kwon Do and Confirmation class.  And my family has befriended J.T. and Shawn's parents.  Cool stuff.

As the year progressed, I got to know J.T. better.  Turns out he, too, is a clarinet player!  We had that ... Filipino Catholic clarinet guy connection, whatever that means.  Since it was our sophomore year, we both went through the motions of retreats and classes for Confirmation and the actual sacrament itself.

We get Confirmed...we finish sophomore year... It's summer time...

J.T. and his family took a trip to Rome during that summer after Confirmation.  Because my family and his family had developed enough closeness...and because J.T.'s mom is super awesomely Catholic... she got me   (and some others in the youth group) some sort of certificate blessed by Blessed Pope John Paul II for Confirmation...which...I just now remembered as I'm typing this...which now I'm inclined to go look for that because I'm highly intrigued...but...I digress--I'll look for it later...

Anyway, after Confirmation...we both got involved with the our youth group.  I guess the Holy Spirit truly has that power to set ablaze within souls, because we were definitely "en fuego" to be an awesome example of what it means to be a Confirmed Catholic.

Our involvement continued through the summer and into the fall.  We were both juniors in high school still going to religious ed class, youth group on Wednesdays, and helping out with whatever events on the weekends.

But then... winter came.  And that's when it happened.

The Sickness
Now, let me just say...the passage of time through the events described is cloudy to me since it's been 9 years.  But that's not too important.  What matters is what...happened.

It was a few days after Christmas 2003.

I forget through what channels that I heard the news, but I think it was some combination of emails and phone calls.

J.T. had to go to the emergency room.  He had been complaining of a headache that progressively got worse throughout the day, and at night it got so bad that he couldn't sleep--he could do nothing but moan and be in pain.  And I think his whole body started hurting too  So his parents took him to the ER.

It only went downhill from there.

It all happened so fast.  Within a day or two, J.T. went from perfectly fine to perfectly not fine.

Apparently he had come down with bacterial meningitis--the bad form of it.  If my memory serves me right, he slipped into a coma.  And while he was in a coma, he either suffered through a stroke or seizures or both...I can't remember exactly.  Either way, because of his bacterial meningitis, it complicated and compromised his health to the point where the doctors said he didn't have much longer to live.

I mean, this all happened in less than a week.  Going from totally fine to death knocking at the door.  Hard to be merry during the Advent season...

I remember going on a retreat right around that time (like, the weekend after this all went down) and we concluded it with a visit to the hospital.  That's where I found out more details about J.T.'s condition and that he wasn't really expected to live.  Whoa.  I might have to lose a friend in death.  I wasn't prepared for this!  I can't...lose a friend after just getting to know him...ya know?

Catholic Strength
But I couldn't even fathom how his parents must feel.  Still can't.  Because...no parent desires to outlive their child.  And here are J.T.'s parents having to deal with that very possibility.  J.T.'s dad is a pediatrician--a kid doctor!  And there was absolutely nothing he could do to help his son.  Isn't that crazy? To be trained how to help kids back to full health but not being able to help out his own son?

 And oh man...there was also Shawn and their sister too.  They had to deal with the possibility of losing their older brother.

And you know how it's usually the mom who freaks out and gets emotional in these types of situations?  J.T.'s mom, who I'll call Susan, wasn't like that.  I remember us talking to her about about J.T. during our hospital visit.  She admitted she's been crying...but the other stuff she said still blows me away.

...In addition to admitting to all her tears, she mentioned that she has complete trust in God and His will.  That if He wanted to bring J.T. back home, she would be okay with that.  My youth minister and his wife later pointed out that her strength in her faith and in God resembled that of the Virgin Mary at the foot of the Cross.

A picture is worth a thousand words.  Susan was a lot like this:

As a young-in-the-faith Catholic at the time, I never really saw what complete trust in God and His will looked like until that hospital visit.  Both J.T.'s parents, as powerless as they were in this situation, could only trust.  And I saw what a modern day Mary at the foot of the Cross looked like through Susan's example.

I haven't mentioned it yet, but there were a lot of prayers offered up for J.T. from the youth group.  I mean, come on...we're Catholic.  Many Rosaries and Divine Mercy Chaplets and other prayers.  After our hospital visit after the retreat...I think we got together nearly every night or at least once a week to pray for J.T.

As I mentioned earlier, my family is friends with J.T.'s family.  I remember taking my mom with me to visit J.T. in the hospital a week or two later.  By this time, J.T. survived the worst part of his ordeal but had suffered through his stroke/seizures.  Because of these complications, he lost motor skills on his right side, speech and memory.  Maybe other things too, but I can't remember exactly.

But he wasn't in the clear.  At that hospital visit, we found out that even if J.T. gets through all of this, he wouldn't be 100%.

I don't recall much of how his health slowly improved in the following months after being hospitalized.  I remember the youth group getting together to continue our prayers for J.T.  And I don't think I had the opportunity to go visit him in the hospital again after school started up again.

I did dig through some old emails from back then and found an update on J.T. dated March 14, 2004.  That's nearly four months after he first went to the ER.  Some highlights:

• Still in the hospital
• Working with a physical therapist at least 5 days a week
• Some limitation in his right arm movement, but can move both arms at the same time
• Might still be another 8 weeks before he's able to go home
• Short term memory issues still, but no loss of mental capacity
• When asked he wanted to tell the youth group anything, he said "Tell everyone I'm doing great and that I'm praying for them."

I don't remember when he finally came home.  I think it was sometime during the summer.  And then...I don't remember seeing him much since that year.  His life was no longer normal since he had to go through a lot of rehab and his progress was gradual...so his public appearances were minimal.

J.T. didn't get to finish out his junior year because of getting sick.  I went on to graduate from high school and go to college.  Throughout college, whenever I was back at home, I'd occasionally run into J.T. before or after Mass.  Early on, I remember observing that his walk was very slow and his speech was labored and slow as well.  And year after year running into him, I saw gradual improvement.

After I graduated from college, I actually saw him a little more frequently.  Consequence of living back at home, I suppose.  I worked at a local rec center where apparently his family had a membership.  And J.T. and his dad would stop by to exercise for rehab purposes.  And then of course, I'd randomly run into him at our parish as well.

How This Affected Me

To be honest, after J.T. and his family went through all that...I can't help but tear up every time I think about it.  I nearly cry because he lived through that.  I nearly cry because oh my gosh...the strength of Susan's faith is saintly to me--and the fact that his parents were totally willing to let him go should God will it.  I nearly cry because every time I encounter J.T. because his good self pierces through his own personal darkness.  Even if his body won't let him be visibly joyful, you can still just...tell that he is grateful to be alive and joyful to talk with you.

With J.T., I totally believe in the power of prayer.  We really did pray a lot together as a youth group for J.T. and his family.  I'm practically convinced that the youth group is miraculous in that sense--not because I'm saying so...but Susan herself tells me that nearly every time I run into her.  She is so humbled and grateful for the youth group's prayer and support.

With today being Mother's Day, I can't help but think of my own mom and the other examples of pure motherhood in my life.  And with Susan, seeing her son suffer like that, caused her to suffer but even in her suffering...she knew that she wasn't in control.  And for her to let go and let God the way she did helped me see a vague reflection of our Blessed Mother.  Awesome.

J.T.'s story provided a very real example of being Catholic.  His story, to me, demonstrates that Catholicism truly works, and miracles really do happen.  He wasn't supposed to live.  But he did.  By the grace and mercy of God, he lived through it.  And we're all so grateful that J.T. is alive today.

I'll also bring up this example.  Above, I mentioned how I worked at a local rec center where he and his family frequent.  There was this one time where my supervisor and I were manning the front desk and they checked-in with us.  I caught up with them for a little bit, then they went on to the gym floor.  My supervisor walks over to me and tells me how amazing of a family they are, and she briefly outlined what happened to J.T. with me.  She didn't know I already knew.  So I explained to her (in near tears, lol) that yeah...I've known the family for a long while and that I had witnessed the whole ordeal back then.  She even mentioned that she gets all teary eyed about J.T.'s story and his family.  Annnnd, my supervisor doesn't even go to our church!  And she knew all this just from encountering them at the rec center.  Whoa.

Where Are They Now?
As I mentioned earlier, I still run into their family randomly at our church and other places.

Because Youth 2000 was a favorite retreat of J.T.'s back in high school, both him and his parents still volunteer each year now that J.T. is strong enough.  I got to see and visit with them at the Youth 2000 retreat last month.  They really dig how the youth is so active and participatory in things.

I recently got to speak with J.T. after Mass not too long ago.  To this day, he's still doing rehab a few times a week.  He still does physical therapy and psycho-therapy.  But, what's really nice is that his speech is mostly back and he's able to move around decently.  His short-term memory has improved as well.

From other recent conversations with him, I know he's currently at TCC getting some basics out of the way. I know few years ago, he had talked about discerning the priesthood.  But recently, he seems excited at pursuing becoming a doctor, specializing in some of things he's going through right now.  How awesome is that?

Ever since I graduated from college and got involved with my parish again, a part of me has always wanted to get J.T. involved.  I don't think he does much with our parish now other than Mass.  Praise God our current youth minister is trying to get a Young Adult group going, and I see this as a great opportunity to get J.T. involved at our parish once more.  Even Susan agrees that J.T. should get involved again, but it's been hard with all the rehab and schoolwork.

Since I always run into them in passing, I never got the chance to get some contact info and J.T. hardly checks his Facebook >_>.  But!  Just last weekend, while in line for concessions at the movie theater, I heard someone call out my name.  Lo and behold, it was Susan! In the same line! Two people behind me!  So then we had an awkward catch-up moment with people between us and that was awesome.  I obtained her number and email address so that I can communicate with her all the happenings.

It would just be really cool to have him back and active at our parish again, especially for us old-school people.  I feel like he would have sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much to offer.

It's my >>MISSION<< to bring J.T. back.  Challenge accepted.

Thanks for taking the time to read this wall of text.  This is truly one of my real-est examples of Catholicism and a moment of conversion for sure.  I hope my current parish friends (teens, parents, young adults, and others alike) get to meet them sometime.  They're an awesome family and they're all really nice and so thankful for God in their lives.

Please continue to pray for J.T. and and his family...because they still pray for us in youth ministry!

Happy Mother's Day!
- JD

**Update: May 12, 2013**
I don't get to see J.T. that often since he still does some rehab and also works.  But, I did run into him and his mom at our parish fish fry during Lent.  I think the biggest development recently is the return or maturation of his mental capacity to be where it needs to be because apparently he's always struggled with that since falling sick.

And of course, I saw them again at the Youth 2000 retreat helping out.  :-)