"I want grandchildren."

It was a very long week at work in Japan. Stress, lots of work to do, deadlines. You know, just another week.

So when it came time to finally leave on Friday, I was ready to take a nap in my 30-minute taxi ride from work back to my hotel.

Alas, it was not to be so.

In all my trips to Japan so far, I've had a good handful of taxi drivers. Some repeated. Some terribly slow. Some terribly fast. Some using their phones to translate their Japanese to English just to tell me the traffic is "slow as molasses". One really attractive Japanese woman who drove like a maniac, cutting everyone off, and probably bringing dishonor to everyone's families. But this particular Friday commute home, my taxi driver actually spoke decent English!

Because he was able to speak English, he initiated small conversations. You know, apart from me telling him, "go to this hotel using the expressway and exit here."  He asked me how long I was staying in Japan and what I do. Stuff like that. Then silence for a while.

He then asked me for permission to ask me how old I am. I laughed and told him my age. He then proceeded to tell me that his son is also the same age as I am. And that his son got married only two months ago.

We were stopped in traffic so then he kind of turns around to say that he wants grandchildren. I could see the smile on his face. From the joy I saw in his face, I could tell that it was such a sincere, genuine desire amplified by Japanese pride in family and progeny. A certain pride and desire that seems to be diminishing back home in the United States.

I affirmed him saying that yeah, I hope he gets to have grandchildren soon!  More small talk, and we arrived at my hotel.

As I'm writing this blog post, this moment with the English-speaking taxi driver happened just yesterday. I've reflected on it some since then.

This desire to have grandkids, through the example of my taxi driver, speaks of a love that is fruitful. A love so profound that when husband and wife come together, it can result in Another. And the cycle goes on. And on. And on. And on. And I got a practical taste of that which is so good, so true, and so beautiful in the simple desire of my taxi driver.

This resonates with me. A lot, actually. I think of all the times that I hang out and pray with the elderly in nursing homes as well as my own grandparents at home, now that they're back from the Philippines.  They're always so proud to have grandkids.

So as for me...yeah. God-willing, I want grandchildren too some day.

- JD

Toyota Crown Japanese Taxi // Integrity Exports
Japanese grandfather // Grandparents.com

While people-watching at the airport the other day...

Oh the gloriousness of stock photos!

... I saw something really awesome!

I was at the airport this past Saturday waiting for my grandparents, aunt, and cousin to pass through U.S. Customs. My grandparents are moving back from the Philippines, and my aunt and cousin are immigrating.

Obviously, with Customs being the way that it is, and the fact that my grandparents are advanced in age, it took a long while for them get through. My parents and I were waiting at international arrivals for a long while. Lots of Facebook Likes and some retweets while I was waiting.

Also during that time, I was watching people pass through. Lots of sweet reunions among family and friends as I waited there tapping through apps on my iPhone waiting for my own family to pass through the sliding doors.

But one reunion in particular stood out.

A mother with her twin toddlers (a little boy and little girl) passed through the sliding doors. Not even 10 feet, and they all see the father waiting at the end of the roped off area. The little girl JUMPS OUT OF THE STROLLER (it was riding low enough), AND RUNS TO THE EMBRACE AND KISSES OF HER FATHER. The little boy, who seemed a little distracted by some toy or something, took a few moments before he caught on, and he himself jumped out and ran towards his father as well.

I was just observing this from my seat off to the side. I don't know how long the mother and children were gone and what country they flew from, but it didn't matter. Seeing just the excitement and the love being shared and the joy being expressed seeing this father reuniting with his family speaks a very resonating truth about its goodness and beauty.

Seeing those toddlers run up to their dad was unlike anything else I had seen among children reuniting with their fathers that I saw that day.  But I can only imagine what kind of relationship the father has to his kids for them to run up to him like that. It's awesome.

I kept thinking how I desire that type of relationship with my own (future) kids (God-willing) to have a moment just like that.

But for now, I can strive to be the best man I can be and love in authentic ways.
- JD

American Airlines Terminal 3's Main Hall @ Chicago O'Hare // Wikipedia

Fire and Division (Luke 12: 49-53)

Thursday of the 29th Week in Ordinary Time.

Today's Gospel reading is from Luke 12: 49-53 ...

49 “I came to cast fire upon the earth; and would that it were already kindled! 50 I have a baptism to be baptized with; and how I am constrained until it is accomplished! 51 Do you think that I have come to give peace on earth? No, I tell you, but rather division; 52 for henceforth in one house there will be five divided, three against two and two against three;53 they will be divided, father against son and son against father, mother against daughter and daughter against her mother, mother-in-law against her daughter-in-law and daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law.”

 At first glance, these are difficult words from Jesus. Without any context or background knowledge of Jesus' other words, and a fundamental and literal understanding, these words are challenging to grasp. Whaaaa?! Jesus is going to set the world on fire like a hellish blaze and he wishes it was already on fire?! AND He doesn't come to give peace but cause division?!

Sheesh! Difficult words indeed, and if I heard all that (or read all that) without knowing much about Jesus, then yes, I might just pull a John 6: 60 ...

60 Many of his disciples, when they heard it, said, “This is a hard saying; who can listen to it?”

to which He replies with a John 6: 61 ...

61 But Jesus, knowing in himself that his disciples murmured at it, said to them, “Do you take offense at this?

Yes, Jesus. I do. I won't run away like the disciples (John 6: 66), but this is uncomfortable.

Because I'm not really comfortable with the idea that You want to set fire on this earth and wish it was already burning.

Because I'm not really comfortable with the idea that You wish to divide my family.

But what do You mean? How am I to understand this?

I started attempting at reading Daily Readings again the other day (which by the way, conveniently, the Catholic Church has a set 3-year cycle of Scripture readings for the entirety of the Church to divulge and learn), and this particular one stood out to me so much that I figured I should blog about it.

Fire. I'm not totally well versed in verses, but whenever I think of fire in Scripture, I think of God's presence and purification or refinement. Like, Moses and the burning bush. And that one praise and worship song, Refiner's Fire.

So maybe when Jesus says He wishes to "cast down fire", He wants to make known His presence like He did with Moses. But this time seems to imply something more dramatic. I mean, how dramatic would that be for the Lord to make known His presence with the casting down of fire? An all-consuming type of fire just to really make the point that He is, indeed, present? Scary thought.

Sometimes the earth is called the "Blue Marble" and because sin entered the world, this "Blue Marble" is not as shiny anymore, if I were to think of it as an actual ceramic marble. Perhaps, because of sin, it is caked on with dirt and grime. But Jesus' fire purifies it. Removes the dirt. Analogies are never adequate but I hope you follow it anyway.

Either way, Jesus seems to mean serious business when talking about fire. His presence. His purification love. Real stuff. Serious business.

Which leads to...this part about division.

I love my family, and I don't want to be divided from them, and it doesn't initially make sense why Jesus seemingly desires that He will be the cause of division for us. But the thing about Jesus is that He desires our hearts. Our souls. Does my heart burn for Him? If He makes Himself known (like, with fire) in order to save us from our sins, I only have two responses: 1) Follow Him or B) Turn away from Him.

I think that is what will cause division--the split between those who follow Him and those who do not.

Earlier this evening I got to listen to my pastor give his vocation story (and brief catechesis on the priesthood). He's an Episcopalian priest convert to the Catholic faith. The main driving factor of his conversion was realizing that in the Episcopal tradition, they do not have the real presence of Jesus in the Eucharist. He realized, over time as his heart burned for Jesus present in the Eucharist, that he will follow Jesus in the Catholic faith because of the Eucharist since Jesus is truly present (fun fact: a red candle is lit near any Catholic tabernacle to let the faithful know that Jesus is present) which fire makes me think of God's presence) see above))).  When he made the decision to convert to the Catholic faith, this caused some division in his family of the Episcopal congregation that he was part of for 4 years. Granted, many were supportive, some even wanted to make the jump with him, but still others weren't too keen on the idea.

And then please pray for one of my friends. She's seriously thinking about joining a religious order because her love for Christ burns so much so that she is willing to drop everything and follow Him. I have a limited understanding of her situation, but I know, for whatever reason, things have gotten complicated with her family. A sort of division.

Not everyone is prepared for Jesus' presence and purifying love. This will cause division. But! What are things that I can do to help others and prepare them to come to a better understanding of Jesus so that we are not divided on the Last Day and for all eternity, but rather unified in the Mystical Body of Christ sharing in the beatific vision of God in heaven?

"If you are who God created you to be, you will set the world ablaze." - St. Catherine of Siena

En fuego.
- JD

PS Pardon my lack of coherent think-blogging...I need to gain more experience points on reflect-blogging on Mass readings

Fire // Thomas's Pics, Flickr

7 Quick Takes (Vol. 5)

--- 1 ---

What a crazy week of intense weather!  Us North Texans and Oklahomans have not been so fortunate in dealing with the barrage of tornados recently.  A week ago, Granbury was ravaged by a tornado and that really worried me since it is not that big of a town, but I know some fellow Catholics who are from that town through diocesan events.  Thankfully, they're okay.  A few days ago, tornados ripped through central Oklahoma along with intense severe weather, and...the devastation got super real for me watching videos uploaded the day of the tornado that ripped through Moore, OK.  It is really sad to see all the destruction, but the positive stories that are a result of this tragedy are truly remarkable.  It's really awesome to hear about the teachers who did everything they could to keep their kids safe at the elementary school.  And then there was that interview of a woman talking about her lost dog when all of a sudden, the dog emerges!

St. Francis (like, of Assisi)...that clever ol' chap...

While I was fortunate enough to not have to deal with these crazy weather events at home, I was really concerned about work.  Simply because, my work is pretty much at the Texas/Oklahoma border.  Why would a commercial airline seat company be so far away in the middle of nearly nowhere...I'm not sure... But...it's so close to Oklahoma and they don't seem to get a break when it comes to tornado season...

Luckily, we do have flotation devices scattered throughout the plant.

--- 2 ---

Let's do take some time in prayer for the victims and families of those affected by the tornado in Moore.  It'll take time to recover, and it will not be easy.

Pope Francis invites us to join him in his prayers (via Twitter), as well:

I am close to the families of all who died in the Oklahoma tornado, especially those who lost young children. Join me in praying for them.
— Pope Francis (@Pontifex) May 21, 2013

I know many organizations on the ground helping with the recovery efforts.  Catholic Charities of the Archdiocese of Oklahoma City is one of the many organizations receiving donations (all kinds) to help victims in the long haul. And it turns out my work is going to match employee donations up to $10,000 so that's pretty cool.

--- 3 ---

On a happier note, I went to my high school's jazz concert on Tuesday night.  I was in the jazz band my senior year of high school and ever since, I've grown to really love and appreciate jazz music. My brother was in jazz band in high school as well, and he's pursuing jazz performance on saxophone at the University of North Texas, which is basically known to have a really awesome jazz/music program...and he also went to this jazz concert because he helped with a rehearsal or two in addition to helping some of the jazz band members prepare through private lessons.

--- 4 ---
Speaking to my brother's friends and former bandmates, I started remembering my college years again.  They asked me questions, and much like Radio Shack, I had answers.  Strangely, I ended up in a group of new Fightin' Texas Aggies who are starting this fall! WHOOP!

But I realized in my thinking of my college years that...wow, I went through a lot.  And my Catholic faith definitely played a role in my college experience and so I ought to share that via my blog at some point.  Stay tuned!

--- 5 ---

I'm sooooo stoked for my trip to Brazil this July! Maybe I did start obtaining items that should help with the trip like...last July...but...now that we're getting closer, I'm starting to take the packing list a little more seriously.  This has opened up a world of camping supplies (or the convenience of camping-caliber supplies) previously unknown to me.

I also started shopping around for small Texas giveaways to exchange with people around the world because apparently that's like, a thing to do.  Unfortunately, I don't really know of any Texas-centric stores other than at the mall.  I actually kind of dreaded going to the mall because traffic around the nearest one is terrible due to highway construction and ... malls are crowded...

Doing all the paperwork or obtaining of paperwork for my visa application was a bit of a hassle because I've never gotten something notarized at the bank before.  And yes, I did make newb mistakes like not actually bringing the necessary documents to be notarized.  Haha oh well, but...in the end, I succeeded! The trials are worth it!

Future blog posts on this, for sure!

--- 6 ---

Grandma is gone and now my family has to get used to doing the simple things.  These things include but are not limited to cooking every meal, folding laundry, yelling at my dog in Tagalog, opening and closing blinds daily, and keeping up with Filipino soap operas (which my mom pretty much has that covered since she also queen of the DVR).

It was funny last weekend because my mom escorted my grandmother to Canada and so that left my dad, my bro, and myself to fend for ourselves in terms of meals.  Yeah, we ended up dining out for breakfast and lunch last Saturday...and I ended up cooking Hamburger Helper for the first time in my life for dinner. Milestone moments in life, I know.

It was good! And browning ground beef is pretty exciting!

--- 7 ---
The familiar awkward question was asked of me at the jazz concert that I mentioned in --3--.  A band parent I have befriended asked me how I was doing since it had been a while.  My tired answer to the question is that I'm doing well and ...busy.  So, naturally that led her to ask what do I do besides work.  And  I told her that I volunteer up at my church a lot.  I would expect the next question to dig deeper as to exactly what I do in terms of volunteering up at my church...but no.

Her next question was..."have you met a nice girl at your church?"  Ah yes, the question regarding my relationship status.  I told her that no, I haven't yet... with the assumption that she really meant "are you currently in a dating relationship with a nice girl at your church?"  There are a lot of nice girls who go to my church, but I'm not currently dating.

If only she was Catholic...then I think it would make more sense for her to know that...

ONE DOES NOT SIMPLY BE A SINGLE CATHOLIC
AND NOT CONSIDER ALL THE OPTIONS

I don't talk about my vocational journey on this blog enough (at all?), but I think I want to highlight others' first. More to come regarding that since...I found out in the past two weeks that FOUR of my Catholic friends are going to enter religious communities or seminary soon!

Dem takes are quick!
- JD

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Hamburger Helper Beef Stroganoff / Betty Crocker

7 Quick Takes (Vol. 4)

--- 1 ---

Annnd...looks like my grandmother is first to completely move out of the house.  Well, my grandfather did last year, and now my grandmother will follow suit.  They moved in with my parents and me back at the beginning of the 1990's and have lived with us since recently.  They immigrated from the Philippines!  In recent years, my grandfather desired to move back to his home in Manila, and so my mom and her siblings have been working at getting the old house renovated.  My grandfather moved back last year to oversee the completion and now that it is done, my grandmother moved out today to go be with him.

It's hard to tell, but we are, in fact, in Canada. 2010.

But! She has a pit stop in Canada for like...a month.  My aunt and her youngest daughter is finally getting married up in Canada so she'll be there for that before moving to the Philippines.  Yes, I have Canada-pino family members.  Nearly all of my mom's siblings live up there. Cool, eh?

I don't know that it's hit me yet that it'll be really difficult having both my grandparents on the other side of the world and not being able to see them on a near-daily basis...but...at the very least...I'm truly grateful for having grown up with them so close to home (so close, hey were actually in my home).  Time for me to figure out how to cook Filipino dishes...

--- 2 ---

One of my Catholic friends invited me to this monthly "night of recollection for men" in the neighboring diocese.  It's hosted by Opus Dei (the real one...not the one where you have to crack Da Vinci codes) at a Syro-Malabar Catholic parish.  The zhwaa?  The parish intrigued me because it looked like a normal, typical Catholic parish but the hymns/books in the pews were totally a different language and some of the words seen throughout the sanctuary weren't even English.  I just looked it up and The Order of Syro-Malabar Qurbana is an Eastern Catholic rite that originated in India and is in full communion with Rome.  Intriguing, indeed.  I also noticed how there were absolutely no kneelers in the pews.  Just knees to carpet.  Good thing I've been practicing for moments like this.

This "night of recollection" involved a meditation led by the priest, who also heard confessions at points throughout the night.  There was an examination of conscience and classroom time to learn more about a topic, which in this case was the virtue of temperance.  It ended with exposition, adoration, and benediction of the Blessed Sacrament.  Apart from microphone issues at the beginning which made it awkward...it was a good night to reflect and pray even though my schedule is busy enough as it is.  This experience reminded me a lot of that silent retreat I went on a while back...but...in the space of a few hours.  Since it's monthly event, I look forward to going next month.

--- 3 ---

I've mentioned before that we Catholics are spoiled.  We're able to go to other Catholic parishes to partake in the sacraments if necessary.  Yes, I'm known to go to other parishes for confession because sometimes my own parish's times for confession don't work out with my schedule.  I'm beginning to consider to just sticking with my parish or spiritual director for confession because there's a particular parish in my circuit of backup-parishes-for-sacraments that something weird always happens every time I go.

Last weekend I went to this other parish for Confession.  And I was utterly shocked. And disappointed. But...I have a blog post waiting to be posted regarding that.

--- 4 ---

I think a good indicator of answering God's call and will for one's life is this certain, profound joy expressed that is noticeable and unique.  In a previous Quick Takes...I mentioned that my friend was acknowledged at an event of her answering the call to the religious life.  Well, yesterday my friend shared her story and journey on how she arrived to saying "yes!" to the call to serve as a religious sister with the Franciscan Sisters of the Immaculate, a cloistered community of intense prayer yet with missionary outreach.  What really stood out to me was seeing her joy in finally arriving at this decision to enter into the religious life...not that it was easy to make this decision...but...experiencing the peace and joy in knowing this is what God wants her to do.

Smiling is a good habit. Not to be confused with habits.

Yes, so as long as this blog is entitled, "En Fuego"...and so as long as St. Catherine of Siena said "If you are who God calls you to be, you will set the world ablaze"...then yes, I'm interested in just trying to be who God wants me to be.  How do I figure that out? How do I know? ...stuff like that.  Some words of encouragement from a friend.

--- 5 ---

My Aggie Network seems to be increasing as of late.  No, I don't mean that I'm getting more sports coverage because the Aggie Network is not the same as the Longhorn Network (#joke...but it would be more like Texas Exes).  It seems as though my company likes to hire Aggies...and I'm okay with that because it makes it easier to talk to coworkers, haha.  I officially met three Aggies in the past few weeks...and two of them were in the aerospace engineering program as well!

WHOOP!

--- 6 ---

Pope Francis canonized 800+ saints this past Sunday.  I mean...in addition to the individuals canonized, there was a collective group canonized as a whole!  Italian martyrs, because the Ottoman Empire apparently beheaded people who weren't willing to convert to their religion.

I bring this up because there's a lot of Christian persecution in that part of the world still...and subtlety here in the United States.  Is my Catholic faith worth dying for? Yes.  Is the world going to gun for me because I'm Catholic? Absolutely.  Am I ready to die for my faith? Not sure...will I ever be ready? 800+ Italians in the 15th century apparently were ready.  What a witness to their faith!  #inspiration

--- 7 ---
I was somehow invited to like...4 weddings this year and 3 of them are Catholic weddings.  I'm legitimately excited! The first of these weddings is next weekend and I think it'll be the most Catholic wedding I would have ever gone to.  Tune in later for more details!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

- JD