Because of Eli

A little over a month ago, I blogged about this Catholic Answer's radio show featuring Chad Judice as the guest. If you recall, his son, Eli, was diagnosed with spina bifida and wasn't expected to live or have good quality of life. As I heard Chad talk about this story regarding on his son on the radio, I was inspired to hopefully read Chad's books regarding Eli someday.

Well, I didn't mention it after I had written that blog post, but literally the following week I found out my parish's Respect Life Committee would be hosting Chad Judice at our parish in the month of November to kick off their new series of events entitled, "Fridays for Life", where they will invite someone every quarter to talk about pro-lifey things. Like, I had no idea that they were planning on inviting him! So when I found out he would be coming to my parish to come speak, I couldn't pass up that opportunity. 

And that happened the other day!

What did he talk about?

Even though I had heard the basic gist of Eli's story via that radio show and a little bit from Chad's EWTN appearance on The World Over, it was definitely more gripping to listen to him speak in person. He shared with us the state of his life prior to Eli and how normal it was. He's a history teacher and coach, and one time one of his students asked Chad before he got married what his greatest fear was, and he answered with having a child with special needs. Before Eli, Chad's faith was meh.

After giving us this background, he began to recount the process of how he and his wife found out about Eli's condition with spina bifida. Their doctor recommended abortion and for a moment, she considered it. But something stirred within them to decide to keep the baby.

The parts of the entirety of the story that stood out to me were those seemingly miraculous (or coincidental) moments. Chad teaches at a Catholic high school, and it was miraculous to him that hundreds of teenagers genuinely prayed for Eli's healing. This was miraculous to him because our culture today doesn't make it conducive for the average teenager to care about this sort of thing, AND the fact that they prayed showed him that they acknowledged that Eli is in fact a human being in his mother's womb and not just a clump of cells with deformities.

What I also found quite interesting is how the Daily or Sunday Gospel readings over the course of this process seem to fit soooooo well with whatever Chad was dealing with at the time. He shared with us those readings that were cause of hope and inspiration for him at major milestones throughout this process.

Chad also detailed how his life of prayer increased in dealing with all the emotional and spiritual challenges in accepting the fact that his son isn't going to live a normal life. He provided more seemingly miraculous moments when praying at the grave of Charlene Richard, who is on her way to beatification. Chad and his wife went to a "healing priest". His wife received a rose after praying a novena for St. Therese of Lisieux's intercession, which for every knowledgeable Catholic, that's a real deal. And he listed many more instances of how God seemed to have offered him and his wife consolations in their decision to have Eli, but not without challenges.

Eli was born in 2009. Despite spinal and neuro problems from his condition, he's doing pretty good. He cannot walk. He cannot go to the bathroom on his own--someone else has to manually empty his bladder or induce a bowel movement. He's on medications to prevent epilepsy and urinary tract infection. He loves to swim. He loves baseball. He's pretty cognitive despite brain problems. He's in pre-3K. It takes full effort from everyone around him to take care of him. Chad mentioned that his in-laws and his own parents are pretty involved in taking care of him and are on rotation for weekends.

How did this affect me?

I think spent 75% of the time reminding myself not to cry. In my head, I kept saying to myself "Don't cry don't cry don't cry don't cry don't cry!" I guess I was just moved by Chad's inner strength at dealing with all this because I realized that if I were in his shoes, I don't think I could handle it. But that's where his story is inspiring. Chad couldn't handle all this on his own. He realized he had to surrender to God's will, and in doing so, he found the strength to endure this. He also realized that he can longer live for himself. That whole idea of agape love (self-sacrificial love) made manifest in caring for Eli, because without the love and care of others, he would die. But to care for him demands so much time and effort, even if it's inconvenient or unpleasant. Chad said, "love isn't about feelings--it's a decision." And I see in the Judice's lives that self-sacrificial decision to will the good of each other and the good of Eli, which is authentic, profound love. Inspiring!

But yeah, I began to start reflecting on my own prayer life and thinking about my own inner strength while listening to Chad's story. I realized that I have a lot to improve on. Haha sometimes I feel like I'm too Catholic in a group of Catholics, but I'm glad that I had the opportunity to listen to Chad to help me realize that I'm not Catholic enough...that I'm not trusting enough of God's will for my life.

After his talk and taking some questions, I definitely went and bought his two books. The first one, Waiting for Eli, is the story about Eli. The second one, Eli's Reach, is about other people whose lives were affected by learning about Eli's story. Like, seriously--stories of conversion and hope because they've read Chad's first book. He gave us a preview at the end of the talk (ie. shameless plug, but that's understandable). Fascinating! I hope to start these books sometime after I finish some of the current books I'm currently reading!

Anyway, what a cool opportunity to hear him speak. Please pray for him and his family, especially for Eli!

You can follow Chad Judice at www.chadjudice.com, which has links to his social medias and books.

We need stories of hope and inspiration, and be reminded that there's only so much we can do and control. The rest is up to God. And I'm glad I had the opportunity to hear Chad tell this story in person.

Because of Eli.

- JD

Many Hats and Humility (Luke 18: 9-14)

30th Sunday In Ordinary Time

Jesus addressed this parable
to those who were convinced of their own righteousness
and despised everyone else.
"Two people went up to the temple area to pray;
one was a Pharisee and the other was a tax collector.
The Pharisee took up his position and spoke this prayer to himself,
'O God, I thank you that I am not like the rest of humanity --
greedy, dishonest, adulterous -- or even like this tax collector.
I fast twice a week, and I pay tithes on my whole income.’
But the tax collector stood off at a distance
and would not even raise his eyes to heaven
but beat his breast and prayed,
'O God, be merciful to me a sinner.'
I tell you, the latter went home justified, not the former;
for whoever exalts himself will be humbled,
and the one who humbles himself will be exalted."

Click here for today's readings (NAB)

For those who know me personally these days, they know that I do a lot of volunteering. A lot. Like, I wear many, many hats. I don't blog about everything that I do because ironically, I'm too busy doing stuff to blog about doing stuff.

Now, for all the "good" that I do helping out at my church and helping out in my community, it may seem like I am attempting to do a lot of good for my own sake. But, no. I am not trying to earn my way into God's good graces.

Last Sunday, I had to teach a class on the corporal and spiritual works of mercy. I stressed to the students that the reason why Catholics engage in social justice is because we, all of humanity, deserve dignity. And the works of mercy are ways that we can give people that dignity. We are all called to help out the "least of us" as Jesus because helping the least is helping Him. When He was hungry, did I give Him food? When He was thirsty, did I give Him drink? Etc, etc.

I fast twice a week, and I pay tithes on my whole income.

With great emphasis, I stressed to the students that no matter what good we do, we cannot earn our way into heaven. No hundreds of hours of community service will guarantee a cozy spot in heaven. Yes, I feel like I've earned 10 Green Cords (a cord earned for completing 100 volunteer hours at my alma mater), but I know and realize that won't necessarily get me to where I ultimately desire even though I do (what seems like) a lot.

There needs to be a level of humility whenever I engage in the volunteer work that I do. Humility helps forge our hearts to love God and others more than our selves. It increases our capacity to love because we're no longer concerned with self, but rather more concerned with the Other. Through humility, I decrease, so that others may increase, and by having others increase, God increases in my life. 

O God, be merciful to me a sinner.

It is through humility that I can recognize my imperfection. I mentioned this the other day how I had a very real moment in silence while driving home from work because I realized I had to change a certain aspect of my life that has been holding me back from being who I am created in the image and likeness of God. I think the root cause of many sins is the (rather deadly) sin of pride. I see that, quite evidently, in today's Gospel reading with the Pharisee. But yet in the end, it is not he who is held in high regard for he boasts with a sense of pride of his good doings. I often find myself like the Pharisee. "I'm such a pro chaperone!", "I prayed ALL THE MYSTERIES of the Rosary today!", "Psh, I don't use kneelers." ...and the list goes on... But I need to be humble like the tax collector.

See, the temptation of being proud in my good doings is that now the attention and focus is all on myself. This leads to selfishness. And if I am filling myself with only myself, then I have no room for others. And authentic love requires an outpouring of self rather than an inpouring (which apparently that isn't a word...but you get what I mean). O how many times have I fallen because of my selfishness! How many times have I failed to love others because I only wanted to love me!

I thank you that I am like the rest of humanity.

And so, I have to have humility. I have to arrive at the point to recognize that life isn't about me. In everything I do--humility. I do not volunteer seemingly professionally for the sake and benefit of myself, but rather, it gives me opportunities to serve others rather than serve myself. The volunteering that I do lets me encounter the rest of my fellow brothers and sisters in humanity...in Christ... so that I can give of myself in love for them. We're all trying to navigate this world. We're not perfect. But I, at the very least, can do what I can in order give others dignity and mercy.

I think the easiest way to gain a better understanding of humility is to just stare at a crucifix and pray. Better yet, praying at Adoration with Jesus truly present in the Eucharist. If I'm lucky, both are in my view when praying, lol.  It is here, at the foot of the cross, before the Lord, that it becomes very real and apparent to me that I'm just the created and He is the Creator, that I am just the loved and He is the Lover. I am not perfect, without Him. I am nothing without Him. 

That, in the opinion of the world, others may increase and I decrease. Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

- JD

Man with Many Hats // The Foundry 

This type of blog post inspired by Daily Meditations with Fr. Alfonse.

This Week's Moments

Something that we often do in small groups at my parish is briefly talk about a high point, a low point, and a "God moment" from the past week. We do this in order to build community through sharing a little bit of ourselves.

It dawned on me that this type of format would be good blog material because it would be quicker and easier, since I don't have a lot of free time. And as much as I love 7 Quick Takes, those take time to think about and write about, and I often find that I never have time to finish them. Maybe down the road I'll hybridize the two...

Low Point

Several nights ago, I was doing some Internet searching and didn't exactly find the results I was looking for. I was a little dismayed at this, and got pretty discouraged when the results came back rather lacking because it is information I need. And I'll leave it at that. O_o 

High Point

The other night, the young adult community at my parish launched their first ever event! It's a speaker series + restaurant format and Thursday was the first one. Our pastor was the first guest speaker, and he talked about his conversion story (Episcopalian --> Catholic) and the priesthood. I gained more appreciation of him now knowing about his story. On top of that, the restaurant this was held at is a restaurant owned by fellow parishioners and it's delicious! They make everything from scratch! And their cheesecake rivals that of some found in certain factories!

God Moment

God moments are moments when you feel God's presence or God working in His mysterious ways. I have two from the past week. First, the obvious! Our middle school youth ministry had Adoration a few nights ago, and I decided to join in and spend that time adoring Christ truly present in the Eucharist! It's a lot easier to talk face-to-face. Got to hang out with my fellow young adult volunteers and our high school students too with a scrumptious potluck afterwards!

The other God moment I had was yesterday on my drive home from work. I decided to take some time with the radio off. Earlier in the day, at work, I had listened to some podcasts that got me thinking about stuff. And yikes. Silence is a scary thing. It forces me to be alone with whatever I'm dealing with, and be free from the distracting noises of life, which sometimes comes in the form of the radio. I was just reflecting on those podcasts, and I had a very real moment with God. I think I arrived at a moment of realization of brokenness and humilty with a sincere desire to make like a Michael Jackson song lyric and "make a change".

So,  those were my low point, high point, and God moment from the past week. How about you? Comment below! You can sign into Disqus with popular social media platforms!

- JD